Resolution: Stay Home

I sent (a slightly more detailed version of) this email to my coworkers this morning.  Aren’t I hilarious?

Whereas, most of the staff is out of the of office today; and

Whereas, the Windows PCs available to run Access are slow as hell; and

Whereas, the fastest available Windows PC reboots at random intervals; and

Whereas, my 3 year old, home built $600 computer is smokin’ compared to PCs in the office; and

Whereas, I need to do some serious data crunching in Access today; and

Whereas, my slippers are comfortable;

Therefore, be it resolved that I am staying home today to work on this Access data; and

Be it further resolved, should you need to contact me, I may be reached in email, AIM, Google Talk or my mobile phone.

6 Responses to “Resolution: Stay Home”

  1. Erica Olsen Says:

    This is awesome! I may make a few edits and borrow this tomorrow. It’s too lovely and Spring out to sit in the office.

  2. Brian Says:

    Godspeed. Doubly so since MS Access is involved.

  3. sat Says:

    Cheeky bastard.

  4. noneck Says:

    ah, you forgot about the temperature, and how it’s F0@7ing cold!

  5. Joe Says:

    I wish I had the balls to do that when I worked at Williams. Whereas, this job sucks…

  6. nonecknoel.com Says:

    Craigslist + Non-Profit = love…

    last night, Scott and i had a unique opportunity to attend the first of a few non-profit mixers sponsored by the craigslist foundation (CFL). apparently, CLF will be bringing their nonprofit boot-camp to NYC. registration is not yet available, but kee…

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